How to Document Workplace Bullying: A Record That Holds Up

The best record of workplace bullying is a short, dated entry written the same day, in plain facts: when it happened, where, what was said or done, who saw it, and what it cost you. Keep it somewhere the other person and your employer’s IT department cannot reach. Leave out guesses about motive and any diagnosing words.

This post shows you how, with five fields, a template you can copy, and a way to use the record with HR without handing over your whole diary. It is information, not legal advice. Rules on records, recording and complaints differ by country and employer, so if you are heading toward a formal complaint or a legal claim, talk to an employment lawyer, a union representative or a local advice service first.

Why memory alone loses

You may feel certain about what happened. That certainty is not the problem. The problem is that other people will remember it differently, and some of them will say so with confidence and authority.

Elizabeth Loftus, who has studied this for decades, describes the misinformation effect in a 2005 review in the journal Learning & Memory as the impairment in memory for the past that arises after exposure to misleading information. In plain terms, exposure to misleading information can change what people remember about an event. A dated note does not change. That is why the Field Guide entry on documenting contemporaneously puts the note at the center, and why this post is about doing it well.

A record also helps you for another reason. A 2021 survey of 1,215 US adults, commissioned by the Workplace Bullying Institute (an advocacy group) and run by Zogby Analytics, found that 30% said they had directly experienced abusive conduct at work, in the survey’s wording, repeated mistreatment that is threatening, intimidating, humiliating, work sabotage or verbal abuse. If that self-reported figure is anywhere near right, you will not be the only person who ends up describing an incident months later to a manager, an investigator or an adviser who wants specifics. Specifics are what a good record supplies.

The five fields of a good entry

Acas, the UK’s workplace advice service, suggests keeping a diary of bullying that includes what happened, how it made you feel, dates and times, any evidence such as emails, and any witnesses. The five fields below cover the same ground in a form that is quick to fill in.

1. Date and time. The exact date and, if you can, the time. Also note when you wrote the entry. The gap between the two is part of how much weight a reader gives it.

2. Place or channel. The room, the call, the chat channel or the email thread. This lets someone else find their own evidence.

3. What was said or done. Use quotation marks for exact words and plain text for paraphrase, and keep the two honest. “He said, ‘I don’t have time for your questions’” is a quote. “He brushed me off” is your summary. Both are allowed, but they are different things, and a reader trusts a log more when they can tell which is which.

4. Witnesses and who else knows. Names of people who were present, or who you told the same day. If nobody witnessed it, write that, since it is useful context.

5. Effect. What changed in your work (“removed from the client call,” “missed the deadline because the file was withheld”) and, in one line, how you felt (“felt sick, left the room”). The work effect is what makes the entry matter to an employer. The feeling line keeps it honest without turning it into a diary.

A template you can copy

Paste this into a notes app on your personal phone.

DATE AND TIME:
WHERE (room, call, chat channel, email thread):
WHAT WAS SAID OR DONE (exact words in quotes; label paraphrase):
WHO WAS THERE / WHO I TOLD TODAY:
EFFECT ON MY WORK (specific):
EFFECT ON ME (one line):
EVIDENCE (email subject and date, file name, where a screenshot is saved):
WRITTEN AT:

Here is what a filled-in entry looks like for Sam (composite scenario), a project coordinator:

2026-03-12, about 2:05 pm. Written at 2:40 pm.
Thursday planning meeting, Room 4, six people present.
When I raised the delay on the vendor contract, [manager] said, "We don't need
your opinion on this." Then, to the group: "Can we get back to people who know
what they're doing?" Two people looked down. Nobody spoke.
Present: [colleague A], [colleague B], [colleague C], [manager], [director].
I told [colleague A] by chat at 3 pm.
Effect on work: my vendor update was cut from the agenda. The vendor risk is
still unassigned.
Effect on me: felt sick, left at the end without speaking.
Evidence: agenda email 3/11 (my item listed); revised agenda 3/12 (item removed).

That took under five minutes. It contains no theory about why the manager did it. It does not need one.

What to keep out of the record

The strongest logs read like a witness statement, not an argument. Keep out:

• Motive. "He was jealous of me" is a guess. "He said X after I presented Y" is a fact.
• Labels and diagnoses. Words like "narcissist," "gaslighting" or "toxic" turn a record into an opinion. Describe the behavior and let the reader draw the pattern.
• Absolutes. "He ALWAYS does this" weakens the whole log. Dated entries show frequency better than adjectives do.
• Long feelings. One labeled line is enough. If you need to process more, do it in a separate private journal.

Two Field Guide entries mark useful boundaries. A log is not the same as gunnysacking, where someone quietly saves grievances and unloads them all at once for maximum damage. Your log is written the same day, so that problems can be raised while they are current. And a log is not manufacturing the record, which describes staging messages or meetings so they can be quoted later. Yours is a private, honest account of what happened, written as it happened.

Where to store it, and what to collect

Store the log on a personal phone or a personal account that no one at work can open. Keep a second backup, since a single phone can be lost. The Field Guide’s entry on the log itself makes the same point: the work laptop and shared drives are the one place both your employer and the person you are documenting may have access.

A few practical points:

• Emails and files. You may lose access to work systems on the day you leave. In your log, note the sender, date and subject line of key emails so you can identify them later. Check your employer’s policy and, if you are unsure, ask a lawyer or union representative before forwarding or copying company documents, especially confidential ones.
• Messages and screenshots. Acas lists screenshots of social media posts and emails as useful evidence. Save the originals and note the date you captured them.
• Recordings. Rules on recording conversations differ by country and region, and in some places everyone in the conversation must consent. Written notes of your own experience are the safer default. Check the law where you live before you record anyone.
• No witnesses. Acas notes that most bullying happens out of sight of others, and that having no witnesses should not stop you reporting. Your same-day note is still useful.

Build the habit

Write within 24 hours, and ideally within the hour, before the day’s other events blur it. Two more habits help. Once a month, spend ten minutes reading the entries in order and look for repeats: the same person, the same setting, the same kind of remark. And keep recording your own wins in a separate file. The entry on building the record yourself covers that side, since a record of what you did is as useful as a record of what was done to you. If the issue is stolen credit in particular, see what to say when a coworker takes credit.

How to use the record with HR

Do not hand over the raw log. It holds your private notes, your feelings and possibly entries unrelated to the complaint. Instead, build a one-page timeline from it: entries in date order, facts only, with a pointer to evidence for each one. Aim for the ten or so most important events.

Before you go in, decide what a good outcome would look like, and write it down. In the meeting, stick to dates and facts, and afterward write your own dated note of what was said. Keep a copy of anything you hand over. The Field Guide entry on knowing the HR reality and when to exit explains why, and the post on whether to go to HR about bullying covers what HR can and cannot do.

Acas advises raising the problem informally first, usually with your manager, and, if your manager is the person bullying you, talking to someone else, such as another manager or HR. That is UK guidance. Your workplace or country may set out a different route, so look for your employer’s policy.

If your situation might involve a legal claim, dates matter. In the United States, for example, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission says a charge of harassment based on a protected characteristic generally has to be filed within 180 calendar days of the last incident, or 300 days where a state or local agency enforces a similar law. Time limits differ elsewhere and change over time, so ask a lawyer or the relevant agency early.

A record is protection, not proof of a diagnosis

A log shows what happened and when. It does not diagnose anyone, and it does not need to. This is a pattern, not a diagnosis, and you cannot diagnose another person. You can protect yourself, and a dated, factual record is one of the most reliable ways to do that.

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